For those of you wondering, I have not heard back yet from the two agents I have queried, but I will post an update once I do (these things take time, and it is really no big deal.) The waiting is a bit nerve-wracking, but I will have a lot more of it to go. Oh well. In the mean time, I am preparing my query letter to go to a few other agents and working out a few character, plot, and world building details before I get into the midst of writing Daughter of the Flame.
Today, I will be posting a devotional—of sorts. It is actually an entry in my journal, which I wrote to God, thanking Him for working through the weak. So please note that “You” is referring to God. And, as an INTJ, when I mention that I want to be the best, I mean it literally (as my family and friends can tell you); not the top one percent, but the very best. It is a bit of an obsession, and lately, it has been weighing heavily on me.
You are Good.
I strive to prepare my best possible self to serve You. I strive to be the best, so I can give You the best. I want to be Your genius, Your foremost scribe in this age, Your leading revolutionary, Your warrior who has trained best of all.
But that is not how You work.
You don’t need the strong.
You have a plan, and it is a plan for the weak, the poor, the uneducated, the unprepared.
Not only do You work through them; You are them.
When You came to this earth, You came as a baby to a poor family. You were a carpenter. You were no one. You came from Nazareth. Nazareth! Can anything good come from there? (John 1:46) You had no proper education and no training. By any logical prediction, You should have died a nobody.
But You changed history.
You saved us.
And You were a nobody.
So I think I understand now. You can do just as great of things with me if I was illiterate or have published a novel before I left high school. You have a wonderful plan—the best plan—for me, and You will accomplish it regardless of my training, my abilities, or my weaknesses.
I think I understand now. For I know the plans You have for me; plans to prosper me and not to harm me: plans to give me a hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11) And I don’t need to transform myself. You will work those plans through me just as I am.
I think I understand now. You said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Your power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake—the carpenter’s sake—I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties.
For when I am weak, then I am strong. (Italicized part paraphrased from 2 Corinthians 12:9-10)
So thank you, Lord. You are so good to me.
Forever in the pursuit of the Truth,